The mind is powerful, we can choose how we want to think and see things which can either make us healthy or unwell. The inner critic that chatters constantly and is with us all the time is our self talk. This blog is about reflecting on our own inner critic. I want to bring to the light that we would never speak to others the way we speak to ourselves. This must change. Why do we treat ourselves so disrespectfully and brutal? In some ways the self critic drives us to do better and to be better, but it also prevents us from being the best we can be.
I ponder where is the line? Self talk is harmful when it is constant and when it is negative. I think of the stories that I have heard from people who are near death and sharing about the deep meaning in their lives and their regrets. It was never about how successful they were or how big of a home they had but more about the relationships that they had built. It was not about the things they could not control but more of expressing regret due to worrying about those things beyond their power. When we are being critical of ourselves question if those issues or criticism that we are telling ourselves are really that relevant. Will they be problems that will matter on our death bed?
We need to practice self love by treating that inner critic and vulnerable feeling with compassion. We need to recognize what is happening when we are being critical of ourselves and then treat it with love. We are all human and we all make mistakes. This is apart of being alive and living. Can we choose to love ourselves and reframe our negative thoughts by telling ourselves statements like, I did the best I could, or I am loved, or I do have a voice. When we reframe those thoughts, we can and will do better. This is how we grow. We grow from validating our failures and treating ourselves with compassion. “When one door closes another door opens.” Moving through the failures that occur in our life and loving ourselves is the real source of success as it builds resiliency and strength. It builds success.